Retro Ads: Top 15 Craziest NES Commercials

This post has been edited by the GamesBeat staff. Opinions by GamesBeat community writers do not necessarily reflect those of the staff.

This week on Craziest Commercials, we take a look at the most peculiar and downright horrifying ads for the Nintendo Entertainment System and its products. Beware the maximum raditude radiating from the following videos — you might walk away from them calling everyone dude.

1) You Cannot Beat Us

The only beating I want to do is with a stick. Gah!




2) First NES Commercial

Consoles come from eggs?

3) Kirby's Adventure

Kirby never needs to pump iron.

4) Crystalis

This is actually selling me on finally playing Crystalis.

5) Dragon Warrior

I doubt any newcomer to the Dragon Quest/Dragon Warrior franchise
would have any clue what the game was actually like based on this ad.


6) Ultra Games

But I thought Konami made Ultra Games, not a floating head….


7) The Legend of Zelda

In the words of Ali G, "Stay off the crack."

8) Swords and Serpents

What if warriors really did have '80s perms?


9) Acclaim Wireless Controllers

They're right! I have a hard time doing backflips while holding a wired controller.


10) Metroid and Rad Racer

Oi, Samus is a lady!


11) Yoshi's Cookie

When I think cookies, I always think of zombie children.

12) Caveman Games

What a disgustingly sexist game.

13) Game Genie

Oh god, the rad-iation!


14) Dr. Mario

Imagine piercing your nose with a bone, kid. Then you'll know better than to challenge a witch doctor to a video game.


15) Doki Doki Panic!

That's a foreshadowing handshake….

Want more crazy commercial action? Check out the past installments: Atari 2600.

Stay tuned for the Sega Genesis edition coming next week!

Screen Shot 2014-03-25 at 2.00.11 PMGamesBeat 2014 — VentureBeat’s sixth annual event on disruption in the video game market — is coming up on Sept 15-16 in San Francisco. Purchase one of the first 50 tickets and save $400!
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