Wicked Lasers has created arguably the most dangerous Star Wars toy you will ever own: The LaserSaber.
The company has released its version of the space-age weapon, called the LaserSaber for obvious copyright reasons. It sports a 32-inch “polycarbonate blade,” aircraft-grade aluminum hilt, and actually powers up and down like the LightSaber. It does this through what Wicked Lasers says is a “magnetic gravity system” that pushes and pulls the light. The unit costs $100, but you have to buy the laser separately, which can run you $300 to $1,000.
But this thing is made of lasers. It can blind your friends and hurt your pets. Wicked Lasers says you should only use it when wearing protective eye-wear, or LaserShades. Also, you shouldn’t use it to sword fight, as it will cause harm to those around you. It doesn’t make sound effects anyway, so get ready to make those yourself.
So, if you can’t do any of the obvious stuff with it, what can you do?
- Get lucky. With that “magnetic gravity system” you’re bound to attract something.
- Facetime with long distance friends to prove you’re doing fine in your studio apartment in the Tenderloin.
- Take Instagram photos of it and upload them to Facebook (still love how meta that is).
- Replace the candle in your Carrie Fischer shrine with the LaserSaber.
- Use it as a giant coffee stirrer. (Don’t actually do that.)
So, we all know you’re buying one, what will you use it for?