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The Dilemma of a 20-something Undergrad

This post has not been edited by the GamesBeat staff. Opinions by GamesBeat community writers do not necessarily reflect those of the staff.

The easiest segway into any conversation for a 20-something like me is easy: what’s your major? It’s basically a condensation of all your dreams and aspirations into one self-defined certificate and program.

I don’t know about you guys, but I used to be embarrassed of declaring my major to someone else. “Why are you an English major?” “What are you going to do with that?” “Oh.”

Sometimes I don’t know how to respond. I used to major in exercise science until I learned I only liked the first half of the concept instead of the “science” half. I wanted to go into Magazine Journalism/Public Relations until I realized that my GPA was an abysmal 2.4, 0.4 points shy of entering into the journalism college here.

An open major like English seems like it opens the world for me. I’ve got a lot of dreams. Some are pipe dreams, but attainable nonetheless. I want to write for a TV show. I want to write an entire screenplay for a movie. I want to write a novel. I want to write a video game.

If I had to narrow down my absolute end-all, be-all scope of aspirations, I’d be either in New York or California. I’d be living the city life I’ve dreamed of since the thought of journalism was conceived. I’ll be working for the big blogs that I’ve tracked since I was a little kid. Kotaku. Gamespot. IGN.

Getting there is going to be hard though. I honestly struggle with my 4000 level English classes. I find it hard for me to care about Margaret Fuller or Walt Whitman sometimes. Really, I wish I could just get my degree and move on. All the free-verse poetry won’t help me with where I’m going, right? Maybe it’s just me being impatient. I haven’t even built up the courage to finish my cover letter to apply to this CBS-Gamespot internship.

It’s because I feel like I’m not good enough. My GPA blows, and I’m sure a bunch of other kids from schools all across the nation – probably with a Journalism degree are applying to the same internship. I feel like I haven’t done enough, learned enough, and most of all, written enough. It’s hard for me to find time to just sit down and analyze how the new DmC is exactly what Capcom needed to change their image, or how the demo from Dead Space 3 lacked the traditional corridor-terror from the original 2 prequels.

I should stop thinking about what I have to do, and just do it. I won’t get anywhere if I don’t actually try.


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