Because, of course, I am a hardboiled technology reporter, and I don’t do frivolous crap like fashion.

Tyra Banks has released a new iPhone app to help other women — and men — learn the secret that she teaches America’s Next Top Models: how to take sizzling hot self-portraits by “smizing.” Smizing, as I learned today, is the art of smiling with your eyes.

You may think that’s a little feminine, and not for the hairier, rougher half of our species. As Tyra tells me, however, you’d be wrong:

The app is Smize Yourself, and it goes live later today. In it, Tyra teaches fans and users how to smize. Listen to Tyra’s instructions, pose, take the picture … and then get specific instructions on how to position your mouth, how wide to open your eyes, and more to become a smizing expert. Or you can simply use the Smize Yourself image enhancement features to automatically adjust your photo and create the ultimate smize.

If you’re like me and never heard the term “smize” before, join the club. But it has been around for a while.

“Ever since I introduced the term ‘smize’ in the early days of America’s Next Top Model, we’ve had an amazing response from audiences and fans all over the world,” Tyra said in a statement. “Now, everyone will not only get their fiercest photos with this lesson in smizing, but they can also have fun by showing off their most exaggerated smizing photos.”

The app is available tonight for iOS, and $1.99 will have you smizing your way to dating heaven.

You know you’ve been waiting for this and have to have it.

Of course, that may just be the stupid in me coming out. I did, after all, just video-chat with a supermodel.

Image credit: Tyra Banks