I’m watching TV last night, which is one of the ways I try to improve my horrific French. And on comes one of our favorite shows, Le Petit Journal, which is kinda like France’s Daily Show.

So, LPJ does a little humorous segment on the BFM Awards that were held two nights ago.

BFM TV is one of France’s news networks. The 11th edition of the BFM Awards was intended to recognize France’s most successful and innovative companies.

So, LPJ mocks the award show a bit (starting at 24:35 into the program). About a minute or two into that segment, some dude starts explaining to the audience the concept of a “unicorn” (in French, licorne), a title conferred on startups with a valuation of at least $1 billion. And then, it happens: A woman rides a unicorn onto the stage.

I’m watching this, and I’m like, “No, way!”


Still unable to believe my eyes, I went to the full video here. The unicorn bit starts about 1h30 min into the video. This moment was intended to honor France’s three unicorns: BlaBlaCar, Sigfox, and Vente-privee.

The un-awesomeness of the moment is epic.

A sort of New Age celtic flute music cues the entrance, and swells significantly. The woman rides the “unicorn” onto the stage. And then proceeds to prance it around for TWO WHOLE MINUTES! In the process, BFM may have set a record for the most awkward thing ever in the history of humanity.

(Note to self: Learn how to say “cringe” in French.)

Even better, the poor dude who had to follow the unicorn on stage? None other than Emmanuel Macron, France’s economic minister. If only they had convinced him to ride the unicorn onto the stage himself.

Look, France, I get that the country is all about startups now. There’s a ton of great things happening here that are totally worth bragging about to the rest of the world.

But, seriously, riding a unicorn on stage? SMH.